Tuesday, September 13, 2011

My World

A light blue
Vibrant as the Caribbean Sea
But soft like faded jeans
Fills my sky,
Flecks of darker blue sprinkled throughout.

It is a sky that I could get lost in,
Happily lost
Fully contented and safe.

My sky is her eyes,
My music her heart beat.

Her golden hair falls down to frame those beautiful eyes
And it is my sunlight.
She smiles at me,
No, that is my sunlight,
That smile.
The same one she makes when she is happy
And when she is laughing
When she is smug
And when she is being naughty.

It is the smile I fell in love with
Yes love.
For that is how I feel about her.
I love her.

Why else would I stay up until 2 am talking about nothing
Only to then struggle to rise for work 3 1/2 hours later?
Why else does my heart swell at the sight of her?
Why else have I never felt safer than when I am wrapped in her arms?
Why else does everything seem to melt away when I look at her
Until there is nothing but her, until she is my world?

Can you still say it is not love?
Can you still claim it is wrong, when it’s only side effects are joy,
When it makes us both strive to be better people?

She is my world.
Her lips my ground,
For one kiss from them releases all doubt, all worry, all far away thought,
And pulls me down into the moment.
Her finger tips dancing along my skin, the only rain I want to feel.
Her gentle breath upon my neck, the only wind I care to know.
She is my world.

When I am alone
Colors are brighter
Because when I am with her
Everything dulls in comparison.
Her smile outshines anything you could possibly have in your world,
So do her eyes.
In her eyes I can see everything I’ll ever need to know.
I can see her happiness, her fear, her anger, her grief, her mischief,
I can see her love.

Yes her love.
For that is how she feels about me.
She loves me.

Why else would someone famous for laughing at romantic things,
Suddenly become a sap?
Why else would someone who hates wearing dresses with a passion,
Wear one just to surprise me?
Why else would she find my rambling cute?
Or my bad jokes funny?

She loves me.
And I love her.
She is my Sloth.
And I am her Bug.

Those nicknames do not make sense to you
But they do not need to.
They are ours,
Meant for our world
For that is where they came from,
And thus where they belong.

She is also my goddess
For she is perfect
No she is not what you would call a perfect person
But she is my perfect person
She is everything I want
And everything I need.

She shares many of my interests
But has many she can introduce me to
She can lean on my strengths
And support my weaknesses.
She is like my other half.
We complete each other
We are a perfect team
We are partners, we are lovers, we are friends.

But we could not be just friends.
I love her too much
I feel the urge to kiss her too much
Being with her feels too right
Too normal
Too natural.

It is not right
It is not normal
It is not natural
You say
Nature is a man and a woman
You say

But I am not talking about reproduction
I do not want to have her babies.
I want her to be my baby
My sweetheart, my darling, my dear, my beautiful,
My world

I want to walk around holding her hand
And be unbothered by you
Be unbothered by anyone
I want to fall asleep holding her close
And wake up every morning with her next to me

Why should that bother you?
You will not be in that bed.
You do not have to love another man or another woman.
What is it that offends and hurts you so much?
Is it my emotions?
The fact that I feel love for her.
Is that what offends you?
Do you not think that your emotions,
Of hate and disgust,
Offend or hurt me?
For they do, greatly.

So does your apparent belief and disrespect,
Your belief that you have some right to tell me how to feel.
Your belief that you understand me better than I do.

Is your life so perfect,
With no problems what so ever,
That you can waste your time trying to shape mine?
Will me loving her,
In the long run,
Really impact your life?

Does my happiness count for nothing?
For she makes me happy,
Exceedingly so in fact.
Do you really believe you have the right to take that away?
Is your happiness dependent upon my sadness?
For that would make me a better person than you
Because my happiness is dependent upon her happiness.

Which is why I sometimes randomly do the Macarena,
Or make silly faces, or ramble about nothing,
Or bust out into my drag king moves.
I will even, despite my terrible voice, sing our songs to her.

While you seek to cause pain
I seek to bring joy and laughter.

Do you still think you are right?
Do you still think you are better than me?
Do you still wish to tear down my world?

My world.
Her.
She is my world.
Her eyes are my sky
Her lips my ground
Her breath my wind
And our love its fire.
She is my world.

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